Too Much Dave

Heat vs. Public Enemies

2009-07-08T22:06:00.008-04:00

So, what's the difference? Why is one an iconic heist thriller? Literally the movie that MADE crime drama...and the other a shallow, weak portrait of a 1930's crime icon?

What makes Heat different from Public Enemies?

1. Fictional vs. Non-Fictional Script - Michael Mann did not have to worry about explaining the story of Neil McCauley (De Niro) and Vincent Hanna (Pacino). It is easy to realize who these people are, a career criminal and a determined detective. Their background/upbringing is not relevant.

John Dillinger's (Depp) background is relevant. How did Dillinger come to be the man he is? The only background we receive is Dillinger's ancedote of "I like baseball, movies, good clothes, fast cars... and you. What else you need to know? ". This is not nearly enough backstory for a 2 hour and 20 minute movie and one of America's most famous criminals.

2. Timeline - With Heat, Mann did not have to worry about acccuracy of dates. He weaves a storyline over a course of months in the case of Heat. Between the opening heist, the final heist and the climatic final scene. The story was what he told. The audience did not have to search for dates, question the timeline or even accept the "period" of the film.

3. Cinematography - Mann is an artist behind the camera. He knows how to capture light, portray a scene, allow a moment to resonate and properly frame a picture. But in Heat he was able to illuminate the entire city of Los Angeles (a strength he reinforced with Collateral). In Public Enemies, he has no singular location to embolden. The problem is lack of authenticity in the location. No single setting is completely "depression era", therefore Mann could not full develop any of his locations.

4. Cast - I love Johnny Depp. I really love Christian Bale. Marion Cotillard wasn't bad. The rest of the cast was alright and it was great to see the corpse of Stephen Dorff have a small role. Mann also used some of his usual suspects. But Heat? Does it get better than De Niro and Pacino? You were getting the classic INSANE Pacino, where he realized he was no longer the top dog actor, but could steal a scene by yelling and saying crazy things like,

"Cause she's got a great ass... and you got your head all the way up it! Ferocious, aren't I? When I think of asses, a woman's ass, something comes out of me."

It doesn't get any better than that. See for yourself.

You also have Jonny Voight dressed up like a cowboy with his handlebar mustache, Hank Azaria in an un-funny role, President effing Palmer, young Natalie Portman, Tom Sizemore during his smack/crack/meth addict days, Ashley Judd looking as fine as she ever has or ever will (similar to Cameron Diaz's moment of perfection in The Mask), and VAL KILMER! KILMER! KILMER! OH MY GOD...Iceman! The real Val Kilmer before he ate his way out of "cool" roles and into funny, portly gentlemen (see: Kiss, Kiss, Bang, Bang). Kilmer is a stud in this movie with his sweet long hair and, in the words of Robert Miller, a "killer bod". When he snipes the guys in the abandoned drive-in movie I almost cried with joy. Bale does win the battle of the Batman though, Kilmer's Batman debuted the same year as Heat, 1995.

I am sorry Ed Scissorhands/Batman, but the best cast stands with HEAT.

5. Finale - You can't match the 30 minutes of Heat. Not possible. Just like the way Orson Welles blew his load on Citizen Kane, it is possible Mann ruined the "crime-drama" genre with his work on Heat.

Heat was EPIC. Public Enemies had the tall task of living up to these lofty expectations. No dice. Michael Mann has a joyous burden that will probably never go away. Mann is again constrained by history, he needed to portray *SPOILER* the death of Dillinger frame for frame. However, Mann did not need to spend so much time developing the ending, it was very anti-climatic. It was also not consistent with the high-speed action of the entire movie. I understand that he wanted to emphasize the finale, but the lack of character development left for a hollow scene.

Mann Oh Man!

2009-07-08T00:38:00.003-04:00

Michael Mann lets me down again. This is two in a row. The worst part? Mann can't pawn the awfulness of this film off on Colin Farrell.

5 Goobers for Public Enemies

Upcoming Attractions

2009-06-25T11:17:00.006-04:00

These are the upcoming movies that I am getting pumped about:

Public Enemies - This is by far my most anticipated of the summer. It puts together three things I could never get enough of Michael Mann (Heat, Collateral, Last of the Mohicans), Christian Bale (TV's Mary,Mother of Jesus, the voice of Thomas in Disney's Pocahontas) and Johnny Depp (Cry Baby, 21 Jump Street). Putting these three together in a movie should be the cinematic equivalent of solving cold fusion.

I am also a big fan of period pieces that actually try to stay true to form. This will not be a Knight's Tale. Mann shot much of the film in parts of Wisconsin that still have a Depression-era feel.

The female lead is Marion Cotillard, from La Vie En Rose, she should add to the film. Giovanni Ribisi is also in the film and I love everything he does, even his role on Friends, hopefully he expands past his type-casting of "slow person" for this role.

I am a bit concerned,however, due to Mike Mann's last movie, Miami Vice, not sure if I blogged about how horrible this film was. Or about my eternal disappointment of Colin Farrell. Either way, while Mann has created Heat, Last of the Mohicans and the Insider. He allowed the ugly, red-headed stepchild of Miami Vice, out of the basement. I will cringe until I am actually in that movie seat.

Public Enemies is set to be released on July 1st.

Bruno- I really liked Borat. I know that Sacha Baron Cohen is definitely a hit or miss type comedian with most fans, but I think that while his movies are outrageous, he is able to show how absurd some Americans are in real life. Released July 10th.

Inglorious Basterds - Quinten Tarintino's WWII flick. Starting Brad Pitt and Ryan "The Temp" from the Office. I always like Tarintino's stuff so I am expecting the same here. Of course, like everything from the past decade, this is a "re-imagination" of a 70's film that will get absolutely no credit. Debuts August 21st.

There will be more movies to discuss, but this is a short list to start with.

Star Trek

2009-06-25T11:14:00.003-04:00

Star Trek was really good. I recommend seeing it in theaters. I give it 7.5 Goobers. Great summer action film. The cast worked out well. The story line was entertaining. Go see it.

25 Years Later...

2009-06-01T15:39:00.004-04:00

Now, for the second installment of my 3-part Summer Blockbuster Analysis. Today we will be looking at Terminator Salvation. While I can’t say that I liked the movie that much, I can say it was better than the critical beat down it suffered at the hands of journalists and bloggers. The first I heard of the new Terminator movie was at some point two years ago, probably during a theatrical trailer prior to The Dark Knight. I was initially very skeptical about the project, but kept an open-mind.

Pros:
- Sam Worthington, an Australian actor plays the role of Marcus Wright, who is a human turned cyborg. Go figure he was recommended for the role by James Cameron, the visionary who created the first two Terminator movies. We also share a birthday. Look for his next big role in Cameron’s Avatar
- Nice surprise pseudo-cameo towards the end of the film, that’s all I will say
- Moon Bloodgood is gorgeous
- As always, I get way too excited by trailers, especially this one that features NIN: Deceptive!
- Bale digs deep into roles and the added aggression led to his "freak out" on the Director of Photography...which led to the Youtube Dance Remix

Purgatory:
- Ron Howard’s daughter was neither good, nor bad. Just there.

Cons:
- Weak story. The action scenes did not justify a poor plot.
- Bailing on the R rating for $$$.
- Christian Bale mails in his performance, he blends a little Batman voice, with a bit of weight loss and zero emotion. Very disappointing from one of my favorite actors.
- The story did not utilize some of themes from the original Terminator, the movie did not really highlight on the “chase” aspect of the first two and was also void of humor. Humor plays a critical role to the success of the first two films.
- McG did not do much to enhance the quality of this film, he should go back to directing music videos for Korn

After watching this, I made sure to make it up to my eyes/brain/ears by viewing both Terminator & T2. These two films were created in ’84 and ’91, respectively. It was just a disappointment to think of the 25 years that have passed since the original and this is what McG and co. produce. The original Terminator had sooooo much vision and creativity. This film, similar to T3, was destined to fail due to unrealistic expectations. It reminded me of a darker version of Transformers.

Overall: Wait for Redbox/Netflix…or as a cure for Insomnia in 4 years when it is on Spike TV in the 1am to 3am spot.
Alternative: The third installment will give you one alternative. Another is to rent one of the first two Terminator films, make sure to check for the James Cameron seal of approval.

Terminator Salvation
“The End Begins.”
Christian Bale, Sam Worthington, Other People…including annoying Michael Cera knock-off Anton Yelchin
Directed by McG
Written by John Brancato and Michael Ferris (Catwoman & Primeval…should have known…to be fair they did write The Game)
Run time: 115 mins
Shot in: New Mexico

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0438488/
terminatorsalvation.warnerbros.com

5 Goobers. Uninspired.

IXNAY on the XMEN

2009-05-26T13:59:00.002-04:00

The movie would have benefited from this actual cat compared to Hugh Jackman.

Well, well, well, I have been forced to come back to the blog due to recent business decisions at my employer. Let’s see, since my last post I have seen quite a few flicks. We have passed through the post-Xmas dead zone and hit the cusp of the summer blockbusters (everyone ready for Michael Bay to explode something(s)?). I can’t really recall what movies I have seen in the past five months to give a solid rating, so I will proceed to what I have seen lately.

3 summer blockbuster/action/extreme/space/robot/metal/blood/death/babes/movies of the past three weeks:

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

This movie was god-awful. I am confident that the script was crafted around fight scenes and then they connected each with childlike dialogue to transition to the next person Wolverine would slice with his claws. Really gripping stuff. I am not even going to venture into the historical inaccuracies or the reason why a Canadian MANimal would decide to fight in every war relevant to America’s interests.

Supporting cast?

- Ryan Reynolds was used sparingly, he was supposed to be DeadPool, but of course Marvel F’s that character up in the end

- Dude from Friday Night Lights, did he have a Cajun accent? Or was that his attempt at a Cajun accent?

- Will.I.Am – this should be your first warning sign

- Liev Schreiber – Seriously? As Sabertooth? This guy? I bet Live is an actor that is really “respected” by other actors, which means he takes things seriously and would never subject himself to….oh wait, how about 3 does of Scream and an undersized man/cat with oversized fingernails.

- Additional support hacks

I just don’t understand how they could take the franchise character and destroy it. The first X-Men movie was very good, the second was an admirable sequel, the third was directed by Brett Ratner…of Rush Hour fame. So I can say that it was on par with the stylistic action/comedy of Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker. With memorable quotes such as "Logan: Way to go, Furball. " Are you kidding me? Anyway, there are many more reasons I hated this movie, but I can’t think of them. The etch-a-sketch this is my brain has been successfully turned over and shook.

Let’s give it 2 goobers.

Holiday Movie Madness

2008-12-29T16:20:00.002-05:00

Jonah Takalua: Puck you, Miss.

Over the break, I saw a large amount of television and movies. Here is a quick run-down:

Movies:

- Role Models - More Apatow, Stifler being Stifler, Paul Rudd goodness, overall OK, about 5 Goobers.

- Ben Button - Pretty good, very long, touches on life and death very "frankly", I was pleased with the outcome...7 Goobers

- Valkyrie - Labeled as a "thriller", however it is hard to maintain a tense atmosphere when the viewer is aware of the outcome, I had a bit of a pity feeling of pressure for Tom "central tooth" Cruise...also can we see something OTHER than a WWII war movie? Please? 6 Goobers

DVDs:

- The Strangers...really creepy at moments, overall fails just as every other horror flick does, Liv Tyler is terrible

TV:

- Summer Heights High - GENIUS! Chris Lilley has studied at the Gervais School of Comedy

- Some Curb - Love Larry David

- HBO's 4-part series, 'House of Saddam', pretty interesting, pretty awesome, worth the four hours

If I had to recommend just one thing from the list...it would be Summer Heights High. I need to get HBO.

DVD Review: The Dark Knight (not Blu-Ray)

2008-12-20T19:19:00.004-05:00

This blog was not operational during the premiere of "The Dark Knight." If it was, I would definitely have posted about it. Either way, as I drunkenly watch the DVD, I decided to do my first DVD review.

This movie was boss. As a follow-up to "Batman Begins," the sequel does everything it needs to. First, it is much bigger. Shot in IMAX, more action, clearer fight scenes, bigger villans. Second, the dramatic foil does an OUTSTANDING job, I know that it is the politically correct thing to pull for Heath Ledger for the supporting actor, but I have to.

Heath Ledger was perfect. First of all, he did the Joker his own way, he did not reprise Jack Nicholson's role, he did not copy anything from the comics. Ledger was able to channel the feelings/actions of the Joker. It is uncanny. After watching the movie with a roommate, he stated it perfectly, he does not see Heath Ledger in the role. He did not SEE Ledger, he did not HEAR Ledger. After watching Ledger in "Brokeback Mountain," he made a complete departure to become an insane clown. There is no way I can express my love for this character. I loved what Nicholson did for the Joker, but Ledger captured the character in a current mold. He is a terrorist, psychocatic and a bit of an addict (notice how often he licks his lips).

There were a lot of complaints of Christian Bale's acting. First of all, that is going to happen after seeing how well Ledger portrayed the villan. Also, Bale has nothing to prove after excelling in the original. The director, Christopher Nolan, had the foresight to cast Bale. He saw that Bale could 'fake' the wealthy executive in "American Psycho", Bale portrayal of Bruce Wayne brings a smile to the viewer's face. His Batman voice is a bit comical, but this is a movie based on a comic, lay off.

One of my criticisms of the movie is the way that Nolan rushed Aaron Eckhardt's role. He develops his character in the correct way, but unleashes him too early. Also, the fight scenes are a bit slower, I was one of the few fans that enjoyed the rushed fight scenes. It left an air of mystery. Nolan undoubtedly caved into critics with this display.

The story is just as strong as the first. I also pray that they continue the franchise. It is a bit depressing that Bale will no longer be able to battle Ledger in the future.

As a DVD, the movie really let me down. There is no director's commentary, no deleted scenes. Just some crap on the "Gotham News Network". Pretty shitty stuff. I think they pulled out all the stops for the Blu-Ray verison. Which is just another reason thrown on the giant pile for why I need a new DVD player. If you would like to donate to my cause....please leave a comment. Thanks!

Ledger disappeared into this character, that is the only way to explain it.

OZ

2008-12-04T15:21:00.004-05:00

No, not the HBO prison drama that revolved around shanking and shower rapes. This OZ regards Australia the epic adventure from the wonderful, yet rare Baz Luhrmann (who happens to be an Aussie).

Australia runs a bit long at 2 hours and 45 mintues, but manages to bring it all together in the end. It stars Nicole Kidman, Hugh (HUGE) Jackman and a young, talented newcomer, Brandon Walters.

Jackman is without a doubt, in Wolverine shape for this movie. You can also pick out the 'pre' and 'post' pregnancy scenes of Kidman very easily.

This movie stays true to the EPIC formula:

'A' List Cast + Brillant newcomer + wide-shot cinematography + incredible landscapes + action + adventure + accents + love + sex + friendship + war + explosions + evil dramatic foil + a little comedy + kangaroos =

EPIC

The government of Australia poured a lot of funding into this picture and are banking on it to save their tourism in a global recession. The movie ends with a soaring helicopter shot that canvasses a large part of the Outback. I am sure that was contractually bound to the funding. Unfortunately the movie has only grossed $20 million dollars. It also received mixed reviews from critics.

I am going to give this movie 7 goobers.

It is definitely the best movie I have seen in a while (along with 4 Christmases). I have been on quite the dry streak with flicks and this pulled me out.

It was not the best epic I have seen, but there is something unique about Luhrmann's films, especially since he has only directed four. Luhrmann makes great 'movies' in the traditional sense of the word. He makes captivating pictures that are made for the big screen. These are fun movies, but also quality movies.

The cinematography was perfect, the acting was above average, the plot was a bit meandering, but like I said, finished strong.

Excuse the rust, I have not blogged in quite sometime.

IMDB

Rottentomatoes

Shame and Condemnation

2008-10-31T11:25:00.005-04:00

Ed Norton consoles Colin Farrell as he comes to the realization that he is a terrible actor that has gotten by on looks and an irish accent for too long. Unfortunately, no one was there to console Ed Norton for doing this awful movie...hopefully he does not get angry, you would like him when he's angry

I don' think I can continue to blog about movies. Since I began, the majority of the movies I have seen have been crap. I feel like anyone (Dan) who reads this site will just think I hate movies. When in fact, I love movies. I really love movies.

However, I can't start with this review. Pride & Glory sucked. Ed Norton, what are you doing? This is not your movie, this should have gone to someone like Mark Wahlberg or Paul Walker right after finishing Fast and Furious. First, the Incredible Hulk (I have not yet seen) and now this? Come on man, get back in the game.

Colin, Colin, Colin...I keep pulling for you man and you keep letting me down. You are like that friend who is great to be around, great to party but don't leave him in the room with your girlfriend or expect him to come over on a Saturday afternoon to help you move. Won't happen, but you will let it slide because he is so much fun to be around that Saturday night. What's the deal?

Ok, so In Bruges was really good. Not great, but really good. For you Colin, that means it was F'n FANTASTIC. I need you to pick scripts like that. Not scripts that have you get the wrinkles out of new born babies (if you have seen this movie you know what I mean).

Do not see this movie. It is everything that is wrong with a cop drama, I could gather a class of 4th graders to write a better, more realistic plot.

Hopefully these people are not paid to do this. This critic cited the "gritty realism" that made this movie a "B" in her mind. Yeah, I guess it was gritty realism, if you replace "gritty" with "terrible" and "realism" with "blatant out-dated stereotypes". Then that would work.

My favorite scene was the climatic bare-knuckle brawl between two Irish NYPD in an American "Irish" pub. Cue the Riverdance music!

This movie gets ONE GOOBER. Do not see this movie. Only if it is on FX in seven years and it is a Wednesday afternoon and raining outside.

FOR A MUCH BETTER REVIEW: GO HERE

F OPEC

2008-10-24T11:02:00.004-04:00

The last couple months have been unprecedented in my young life. The global markets have taken up BASE jumping, Wall Street has been downgraded to a Lane and Washington is now telling everyone to "grab an umbrella" because the Fed has a "handful of stacks" and is "making it rain" on Wall Lane, the world and Americans alike.

Things do not look good. But, there are a few small benefits. For one, OIL found out that people can take the bus. Not good for Daniel-Day Lewis, he is pissed. So are these guys.

OPEC is definitely not happy with the drop in global demand for oil. They convened today for an emergency meeting. There plan is to cut production.

"The decision was straightforward," Saudi Oil Minister Ali al-Naimi said after the meeting.

"OPEC will do whatever is necessary to balance oil markets."

This is what they said. They need to balance the oil market. I have to admit, they did a great job of balancing the markets over the past year, when it came close to $150 a barrel in the middle of the 2008 summer. I am really glad they were looking out everyone. But now they want to manipulate the price to have it go back up. This is a real dick move. Lower oil/gas prices help consumer purchasing power, which is an essential correction for a recession. OPEC does not care about a global recession. This is what is wrong.

The fact is OPEC is a cartel, that acts like a cartel. There really is no surprise there.

Just as the lower price of oil is a silver lining to the current economic clusterfuck, (I think we have moved past "crisis" at this point) the former high oil/gas prices did make Americans and the rest of the world finally wake up and realize that we need to stop filling our snowmobiles with jet-fuel in July. It also finally displayed the importance of alternative energies...both candidates are behind it now.

Hopefully this guy learned his lesson from prices in July.

Balance is the name of the game. Balance in the economy, among compaines, among countries and individuals. Not too little, but not too much. I believe that Americans may have learned a valuable lesson from the last few months, not to be so greedy. We need to pass this along to OPEC.

Listen to Matt Nathanson

2008-10-08T16:33:00.006-04:00

Last night I headed over to Sixth & I for a concert. The concert was held in a historic synagogue. Which translated to no beer. If this had been a concert for Yanni or the Blue Man group, I would have freaked out at this prohibition...fortunately it was for a folk/rock guitarist named Matt Nathanson.

For those of you who do not know him, Nathanson is a very talented singer/songwriter. As much as I like his music, his real forte comes in the form of live shows. Nathanson is hilarious, he frequently banters about sex, heavy metal and his favorite shows like Gossip Girl. Considering the amount of cursing and graphic imagery at past shows, I was curious to see how Nathanson would handle being in such a holy place. He did not fail me, as he arrived on stage he observed that we were in a "fuckin' synagogue". That was only the beginning.

Ok, I am not going to give a full re-cap of the night. Know this, Nathanson is talented, hilarious and in touch with his audience. He also keeps ticket prices low. He is currently on a Fall tour and could very well be on his way to your city.

I wholeheartedly endorse Matt Nathanson. I am not one to do this regularly, but I promise you will get your money's worth.

Miracle at St. Anna

2008-09-30T13:01:00.006-04:00

Spike Lee seen begging Denzel Washington to be in his crappy movie. Denzel laughs in Spike's face and reminds him he does GOOD movies.

Oh man, this movie sucked. This was obviously Spike's big-screen tribute to the NY Knicks. He really wanted to capture the "suck" aspect.

The story sucked. The cinematography sucked. The 160 minutes it took sucked. Complete waste of my time and anyone who is thinking of seeing it.

Spike needs to stay away from this genre. Spike also needs to take a dose of his own medicine. The stereotypes he creates in this awful movie are the same he complains about all the time. He also stepped on the toes of WWII Italian partisans.He also needs to get an actual screenwriter, not the egotistical author.

I am going to give it 1 Goober.

The 'miracle' was that I sat through the entire movie.

Burn After Reading

2008-09-17T16:42:00.003-04:00

Burn After Reading was good. The Coen Bros. have created such masterpieces in their career that each movie they make will be held to a higher standard. That is why this movie is only good. Hell, if Michael Bay directed this movie I would have given it 10 Goobers...but I am not sure how he would have snuck in an explosion or two.

Clooney copied himself from Intolerable Cruelty...but since no one saw that movie it will seem like a fresh, unique character. Clooney wins again! Ah!

I love J.K. Simmons. He is hilarious.

Overall, you should see this movie. Why not? I will give it Six Goobers.

I would just like to point out that the Coens can do comedy better than most...and they can do drama better than anyone. They are a rare breed in Hollywood.

Transsiberian

2008-09-08T16:35:00.021-04:00

I was too lazy to MS Paint in some explosions.

If Michael Bay got his inartistic hands on 'Transsiberian', the title would have been changed to 'Train of DEATH! Explode!' and he would have added quite a bit of C4 charges and a dash of Nick Cage.

Fortunately, that didn't happen.

I forgot what my Goobers rating scale was, but I give this movie: 6.5 Goobers (out of ten)

The film is directed by Brad Anderson and stars Woodrow Harrelson, Emily Mortimer, Kate Mara and Sir Ben Kingsley. It also runs a little long at 111 minutes.

The movie is basically a murder mystery/suspense thriller. Similar to writer/director Anderson's previous full-length suspense flick El Maquinista (featuring Christian 'bag of bones' Bale). In 'Transsiberian', Anderson moves away from copying Alfred Hitchcock and places his own personal touch on this film. While Anderson has done other genres, such as comedy, this will likely be his forte with future projects.

The acting was solid. Woodrow plays the lovable/naive/idiot/religious/friendly husband role with a pathetic admiration for trains. Mortimer plays the 'wild child converted into boring wife because she was nervous of dying from overdose or some sexually transmitted disease.' Instead of building up this sorted past through subtle dialouge, Anderson throws it in the viewer's face with shots of a 'tramp stamp', defiant smoking and other blatant symbols that shouts out to the audience, "I used to be cool, until I met Woodrow." Mortimer also goes to GREAT LENGTHS to preserve a web of lies. Which makes me really hate her character.

Kate Mara provides for pleasant scenery, not much else...except for one alarming scene towards the end that reminds me of the deli at the Italian Store.

Ben Kingsley is great, he does not have the ability to be anything else.

The movie moves from the 'this could happen to you' genre to borderline preposterous, even for Vladimir Putin's Russia.

This movie will fly under the radar of most major cinemas. I definitely recommend seeing it, however you may want to wait for either a matinée or the DVD release.

TRAILER

A Very JERSEY Labor Day!

2008-09-02T15:50:00.004-04:00

What can I say about New Jersey that hasn’t already been said about Hell? The drive up to NJ from Arlington is estimated on Google Maps to take about 3 hrs and 45 mins. My land speed record came about back in June when I made the trip in 3 hours flat. But, this is Labor Day Weekend! Which means anyone who has a car decides to place it on I-95.

The drive took over 4 and a half. Thanks in much part to State governments that have continued to use the same toll system that was in place when the concept of roads was first developed. The worst part of the trip came at the Delaware Memorial Bridge. After considering Delaware’s size and total insignificance, the government decided to create the country’s best bottleneck. How can Joe Biden be the Vice-President if that backyard of a state he represents cannot be traversed within 15 minutes? This may be the issue that decides the election for me.

We arrived Friday night and relaxed by watching Predator on cable. A little trivia here, Predator may be the only movie that features two former Governors (Arnold and “the Body”). If this anomaly has occurred before, then it is definitely the only Sci-Fi, Invisible, Thermal Seeing, Dreadlocked Alien flick that features two former Governors.

On Saturday, we had plans to drink and go to Atlantic City. The weather held up and it turned out to be a great day. The day consisted of: drinking, Scrabble, bacon cheeseburger, Battleship, cheating, contemplation of Beer Ball, drinking, napping, Atlantic City, Cash for Gold, Bally’s, Johnny Rocket’s, Beach Bar, Gambling, Lori wins more $, Jersey Rats, Drinking, Sleeping. All in all, a good day.

Sunday was beach day. On a related note, we found out that morning that the Ocean City beach was one of 7 lucky beaches that closed due to MEDICAL WASTE! In the world of NJ Beaches, this is a most prestigious honor. Tiny beaches on ponds in the middle of NJ dream of growing up one day to be covered in syringes, diapers, loud Jersey girls and Juice Heads.

The waste warning was dropped Sunday and we headed to the beach. We need to smuggle rum onto the beach because Ocean City is a dry town. While this seems crappy, it is actually a blessing in disguise. No alcohol = No Jersey Girls and Guidos…which makes for a great day at the beach. In Ocean City, people don’t have “blow-outs” or tribal tattoos. These people actually HAVE chest hair and sunglasses that block sunlight. Amazing. This dry town plays a major part in my positive experiences in New Jersey.

The water was a perfect temperature and the waves were big. With the exception of cringing each time something grazed my feet, the ocean was great. The way I see it, the medical waste just gives the NJ beaches character.

As much as I like to think of Jersey as the armpit of the East coast, I have to admit it holds a special, medically wasteful spot in my heart.

Mount Vernon - Opponents Beware

2008-08-25T22:08:00.003-04:00

Washington's personal pig, he only enjoys the finest mud holes

Checked out George Washington's crib this past weekend with Lori, Jay and Nicole. The man on the dollar bill had a nice place. To give you an idea of Washington's accomplishments, please view the video here.

That video basically summarizes the lesser known backgrounds of our nation's first President.

Either way, Mt. Vernon is worth a look.

More pictures at Picasa

Beach?

2008-08-15T15:19:00.006-04:00

Somehow, someway both of the images above represent a "beach." Apparently in Maine, a beach is a combination of freezing cold water, rocks, barnacles, fog, seaweed and young mothers with tattoos.

This is slightly different from what I believe the word "beach" embodies.

Fool me once...

2008-08-11T22:50:00.004-04:00

Edwards takes his wife to Wendy's, but his lady on the side prefers Arby's

I try not to blog about politics, I have my views and I enjoy discussing them with family and select friends. I do not attempt to bring them to a larger audience simply because of my lack of knowledge/information/bias. I don't know all the facts, if I did, I would be much more outspoken.

But, this story is just another reason I get so pissed off with politicians.

In late summer of 2007, I picked up a copy of Esquire, very metro, to read while I languished in my little hell of airports. The cover story featured John Edwards, who at that point, was in the running for the Democratic nomination.

While I know for a fact that I would not vote for Edwards, the article definitely helped his cause. I came out of the article with an appreciation for the man that has since waned.

What really bothers me is the lying, not the cheating. Even though Clinton was a "mimbo," he was still a decent President, in my opinion. I am just tired of candidates taking a "holier than thou" stance, attempting to make us believe that they are pious and worthy.

Edwards blocked the release of this story for some time. In the public, he denied the claims to save face. How inflated are the egos of some politicians? Not only did this idiot have to worry about his wife finding out about this affair, but the entire nation as well.

I am just praying for some truth between Obama and McCain.

Live From Maine!

2008-08-09T23:15:00.003-04:00

I finally hit 1000 views! I can't believe all three of you logged on to my site from that many different comps.

My sister and I hopped a quick 1-hour flight from Baltimore to Portland, ME. As usual, the airports were full of surly airline representatives and could not find a way to seat anyone. Once we arrived in Portland, we found the weather to be pleasant and cold.

We stopped for dinner at Moody's dinner, great place for onion rings and then I grabbed a twelve of the state's finest...Geary's Summer Ale.

I will post some images sooner or later. I am pretty sure there are some pirates (homeless people) on the small island across from our cottage. I will make sure to investigate.

Currently watching the Olympics...one of the female swimmers briefly lived in Webster (but had the good sense to leave), she is swimming in the relay with that 50 year old swim mom.

She just won the silver, coincidentally the same color as her hair.

Ok, more from VacationLand later.

The Army finds a new way to totally suck.

2008-08-06T12:05:00.003-04:00

This guy got hosed. Good motto... Be all you can be, for us, not for yourself.

Big Weekend

2008-08-01T12:05:00.002-04:00

Biggggggg weekend...numerous events.

First of all, Jason Simoni is IN TOWN for good! Which means we have 66.67% of the Simoni Clan within a 5 mile radius. Now we just have to wait for Dave to fail out of law school and become a janitor in the DC Metro area. I will quit my job and join you in the custodial arts when you arrive, big guy!

Next on the agenda, I turn the big TWO FOUR. Which, by some estimates, puts me at 1/3 of the way through my life (what a waste so far). Either way, this marks my first birthday in DC and it falls upon a good weekend.

I am not much for planning but I will have a couple b-day demands:

I must drink at Brickskeller's at some point this weekend. Must be done.
I need to have a Delirium Tremens at RFD at some point.
I must share a drink with all of my friends on Saturday.
I need to sleep.
I need to bbq.

There you have it my b-day list. Strangely enough, it resembles every other weekend.

Another thing, I am going to check out Coldplay at Verizon Center on Sunday. Unfortunately, We We Pirates will not be opening...but it still should be a good time. I will have to hit RFD prior to the show.

It has been a good 24 years in my mind. I feel lucky to spend this weekend with my sister, Lori, my roommates and some Simonis. I can't think of a better birthday.

Can't wait for Brickskeller.

Travel Tips - Help!

2008-07-31T15:57:00.004-04:00

CLICK ON PICTURE FOR HILARIOUS USE OF MS PAINT

To drive up the interactive nature of this blog, I am calling on all my viewers, (that's right all THREE of you) to add comments on travel.

I am looking to travel to the United Kingdom in early November '08. This will be my first big trip that I have planned on my own. I am wondering where are the best tickets? When to buy? Flight information, etc.

I also would like to hear about your experiences in traveling to the U.K. Where to go, what to eat, what to drink, how to avoid being robbed and murdered. So, please, indulge me with your comments! Thanks!

COMMENT BELOW!

SHARK WEEK!!!

2008-07-29T00:28:00.002-04:00

Pick Dave's Place comes to an end!

2008-07-28T22:29:00.001-04:00

don't judge a book by its cover

After an overwhelming volume of voting, the "PICK DAVE's PLACE" Contest has officially ended. I would like to thank all THREE of you that participated! Unfortunately, I did not pick one of the two possible locations. Here is my new abode (this place is the bee's knees):

includes the flat oven-top, perfect for 3rd degree burns on the palm

sweet porch abundant with random outdoor furniture

to save $100 monthly, I have turned into a gardener...mom would be proud (note:since these pictures have been taken, those flowers on the right are completely dead)

More pictures will follow. The place has been outfitted with a combination of Craigslist, IKEA, borrowed and other sources of furniture. All four roommates are settled in. I have escaped yet another Slum Lord in exchange for our fantastic land lady Doreen.

PROS: Spacious, too much storage, yard, patio, porch, big rooms, big kitchen, long driveway, street parking, good land lady, good roommates, good location, quiet neighborhood, still close to the Metro (even though I am extremely lazy and will never walk there)

CONS: The house was built well before the Polio vaccine, which means A LOT of creaks. Also, I have a tiny John Malkovich crawl space in my room, the door is always open in the morning, which leads me to believe there is some small mythical creature living (perhaps a gnome?) in my crawl space.

'actual' FINAL THOUGHT: Aside from the house being built before the invention of the helicopter and the Slinky, it is far and away the best place I have lived on my own. I am looking forward to a great year in the pre-WWII lodging.

Chuck Could Do This...

2008-07-25T00:23:00.002-04:00

I have all the faith in the world that Chuck could do the same. Only, I suspect he would adopt the "every bunny for himself" mindset and leave me in the house.

VOTE Arrrgh!

2008-07-15T11:03:00.015-04:00

Vote for my friend's band We Were Pirates...FOUND HERE. They are the sixth video down on the list. You will recognize them because you will see a bunch of "City Paper" banners and also have your face melted. They are finalists with a chance to open for Coldplay at the Verizon Center in D.C. on August 3.

So vote for "We Were Pirates" whether you love Coldplay or just want to see Gabe Fry kick Chris Martin in the "goods". If Gabe kicks hard enough, he could potentially end the grocery-list legacy of the Martin family.

Update on the housing situation is a-comin'!

WHAT?

2008-06-24T16:11:00.005-04:00

I was going to rant about my ordeal at the US Post Office. The 2nd worst place in the world. Ahead of New Jersey rest stops, but just behind the Department of Motor Vehicles. Hell finished a distant 4th.

Anyway, this article in the title is FANTASTIC.

Louise Needs to Shut Up

2008-05-30T14:52:00.004-04:00

(I wonder what Segal's take on stem-cell research is.)

Cross-overs generally turn out bad. Think athletes and musicians selling "fragrances", DMX starring in movies and Johnny Depp dabbling in small-business ownership (see: Viper Room). But, with all these double dips there are occasionally bright spots...such as George Foreman and his delicious grill.

That being said, there is ONE instance of cross-overs that I will never accept: the Hollywood Actor/Politician. This multitasking role is the most egotistical, ignorant and biased of all (see Charlton Heston, any Baldwin, Tim Robbins, Sean Penn, Chuck Norris, Ted Nugent).

Today's outburst (I won't even discuss Sharon "Dalai Lama BFF" Stone), came from the thoughtful, tactful, politically-enlightened Susan Sarandon. Ms. Sarandon is known for her artistic prowess in roles from major motion pictures such as Stepmom and Mr. Woodcock and also her "Best Actress" nominated role in The Witches of Eastwick by the Academy of Science Fiction, Fantasy & Horror Films. To be fair, she actually won an Oscar for Dead Man Walking, but in '96 Elisabeth Shue should have received that little statue.

How did this aging actress come to be so politically aware? Ms. Sarandon attended school at The Catholic University of America, earning a BA in drama. Drama? But don't worry, I am sure she took a class freshman year in Politics and Public Policy.

Anyway, Ms. Sarandon decided to broadcast her opposition to the Republican nominee Senator McCain by threatening a move to either Canada or Italy. What? She would really deprive the American people of her presence if Senator McCain claims the victory?!? Nooooo! I don't think I could handle an America without her!

Sarandon has come out in staunch support of Barack Obama (on a side note, I like/may vote for Barack). Susan dropped this tiny knowledge bomb in the NY Post, "I thought the whole point of feminism is that you're not supposed to be defined by gender. I don't understand the reasoning behind that, because I wouldn't vote for Condoleezza Rice, and I hated Margaret Thatcher."

Why is America entitled to her opinion? Who really cares? I can understand that one die-hard Bull Durham fan registering to vote for Obama, but who else?

Not only should she keep her downplay her political fervor, but she needs to recognize how out of touch the complaint is. What average liberal could possibly pick up and move countries in opposition?

Along with the airlines and baby geniuses, celebrity Op-Eds are one of my biggest pet peeves. I believe everyone should take a stand on politics, but to make outrageous claims in the media just publicizes how ignorant some people can be.

I would like to see McCain win, if only to watch Susie-Q eat her words and continue living in America, making light-hearted family movies with Ellen Page and the girl from Little Miss Sunshine, as opposed to mining sand and gravel in the Yukon Territory.

Pick Dave's Place Vol. 2 - I NEED to live here

2008-05-29T16:29:00.008-04:00

Check this place OUT!

Now, if we step it up to a four person rent, this place is amazing. It is not exactly on the Metro, but I have used my car/taken cabs so many times this year, I do not see the Metro as a giant benefit.

Location: Just west of the Ballston Neighborhood - Arlington
Pros: LARGE, screen patio, yard, garage, home theater system in basement, 4 bedrooms
Cons: Not close to Metro, older home, maybe haunted? wet bar!?!
Interesting Selling "Feature": 2 wood burning fireplaces!
Rent: $3550/mo.

IMAGES via PHOTO TOUR

(I am praying to God that the hamster cage upon the desk will be included in the rent!)

FINAL THOUGHT - The more the merrier! I have found some big ol' "single family homes" when I up the bedroom count. One of the most important features to me is SPACE...and this place has it.

Fly AMERICAN?

2008-05-22T12:43:00.004-04:00

(Turns out, Sam Jackson had to pay an additional $15 dollars to bring that deadly python on the plane)

Have I mentioned my hostile feelings towards the airline industry? Well, my flight to Kansas City today, along with this little news nugget spurred me to write something. Today I flew out of National (Ron Reagan Airport - DCA), which I prefer to Dulles (IAD) for a number of reasons. DCA is much more convenient, smaller, located on public transportaiton and also closer to my home. Either way, I flew Midwest today at 7 am to Kansas City. The flight was average, and by average I mean that it created a one hour delay. Fortunately, the delay was due to weather and did not piss me off as much as the 2 times I was delayed to fix the toilet. Midwest offers nice leather chairs, smaller planes and pleasant attendants from the "Bread Basket" of America. Midwest is one of the few airlines that has stayed away from my black list.

Anyway, back to the story above. American just merged to the biggest airline in America, they now cite "rising fuel costs" for charging $15 dollars for the first checked bag. I prefer to travel and this cost does not concern me that much, but the fact that it is another issue added to the heap of problems this industry has prompted me to complain.

And now as I work from K.C. and watch CNN another fantastic story informed America that the Airline industry cost the American economy $41 BILLION, in 2007 alone. Here is the breakdown:

19 billion op. costs (maint. jet fuel, overtime)
- $1.5 billion went into wasted jet fuel due to delays...notice that America cited "increasing fuel costs as a reason to charge for luggage...give me a break...create a more efficient model
12 billion lost time by passenger
10 billion indirect (retail, hotels, etc)
20% of all travel time delayed

That final statistic made me reflect on all the delays I had in the past year, I think 20% may be alittle too conservative. What I can't stand is that the airlines have a captive market, people HAVE to fly. If I went to McDonald's and found glass in my $1 Double Cheesburger...I would start going to Wendy's (which I prefer anyway)...unfortunately they don't make trains that can cross the Atlantic, or commute coasts in 4 hours. The Airline Industry is taking advantage of the fact that people HAVE to fly in certain situations. There needs to be a change.

Black list:
Delta
United (esp. that "Ted" airline)
American
I assume all other airlines I have yet to fly

GOOD Airlines:
Virgin America - FANTASTIC - HIGHLY RECOMMEND on DC to LA flights
Midwest

I have done my best to reduce the amount of flights I take and the amount of luggage I bring. I think I have done a good job, but like I said sometimes I HAVE to fly...and it sucks.

Pick Dave's Place Vol. 1 - Home Sweet Home?

2008-05-20T18:08:00.009-04:00

(above you will see a sideways shot of the washer/dryer closet, which allows safe sanctuary for people with a clothes washing identity crisis)

So, it is that time of year, when I turn to craigslist and other website to begin the ol' apartment/house hunt. This year I am movin' on up, but prefer to remain in Arlington, VA. I am going to begin listing my "great finds" on this blog and allowing you all, when I say you all I mean Dan, to pick my residence. Starting with the place I found last week. Whoops! Already gone! Well, this will serve as an example of how I will display places:

Location: Ballston Neighborhood - Arlington
Pros: Close to metro, right next to Gold's Gym, new condo smell, etc.
Cons: Tinyish
Interesting Selling "Feature": Elegant Wooden Blinds...nice
Rent: $2295/mo

Images:

(above you will find a picture from the already sold apartment's balcony, located to the left is Gold's Gym, if we picked this apartment I could get twice as huge as I already am, I refer to this feature as the "Simoni would have signed the lease by now"

FINAL THOUGHT - This place would be perfect If I was closer to 4 feet tall. Then it would seem like a warehouse. Plus, it has been rented. Yeah.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

2008-05-01T16:47:00.004-04:00

I'm going to have to go with 6 Goobers on this one. Only because this was the first movie I have seen in the theater in over 10 weeks, which means this snapped the dry spell.

Jason Segel wrote/starred in this movie that continues Judd Apatow's streak of 1000 movies in the past two years. I will comment further...

Google is outside!

2008-04-23T13:05:00.004-04:00

Recently, I read a couple articles on 'The Smoking Gun' (Ithaca alum connection), that illuminated a dispute between an angry private resident of Pittsburgh (drop the h) and the genius of Google. Google offers a new aspect to the Google Maps application appropriately named 'Street View'. This application gives you a 360 degree view from the streets of approximately 20 major metropolitans. Unfortunately, Washington D.C. has yet to make the list, perhaps for security concerns? Either way, you all cannot see the beautiful brick cube I live in. Quite a sight! However, Google Street View allows me to keep tabs on my parents in K.C. (see below).

This technology was created by using a globe-shaped cluster of cameras attached to an SUV. Basically, the SUV cruises through an entire city and the surrounding suburbs. Giving Peeping Tom something to do while surfing the internets. It is really amazing how Google is shrinking the planet. Check out this feature on Google Maps when you get a chance.

“Saying ‘I’m sorry’ is the same as saying ‘I apologize.’ Except at a funeral.”

2008-04-16T10:58:00.003-04:00

So, I have not been on this in quite some time. In the recent months, I have continued to work, work out (5k in May) and visited Lori in L.A. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time so far and realized today that I am closing in on a year out of college. It is amazing how fast time passes.

I have also spent the last couple months stimulating the economy. Between golf clubs, noise-canceling head phones, plane tickets, etc. I will not recognize this recession.

The title to this entry is from Demetri Martin. I just DVR'd his stand-up Person. Pretty funny. I definitely recommend taking a look.

I will try to keep up with this blog, if anyone is reading! If I have any visitors who are blog-savvy, I would love to hear some tips and advice about expanding my audience. Thanks!

One more thing, does anyone know a type of bird that chirps in the middle of the night? I have a family of birds right outside my apartment that appear to be a bunch of night owls, pardon the pun.

VOTE FOR RON PAUL

2008-02-12T14:43:00.000-05:00

Read Ron Paul's economic policy.

Today is the Potomac Primary, which means Maryland, D.C & Virginia will be voting for the Democratic and Republican candidates. If you have yet to make up your mind or are apathetic...please Vote for Ron Paul or at least listen to what he has to say. Click on any of the links to this page or go to YouTube.

Ron Paul is the only candidate who wants to cut government spending, cut income taxes, increase YOUR personal liberty and is the Republican candidate that the troops donate MOST too. He wants out of Iraq and any other country we have no business being in. It is the first step to mending diplomatic ties with the rest of the world. Please look at his website!

Awful

2007-12-29T00:47:00.000-05:00

Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story stars John C. Reilly (oscar-nom for Chicago) and is directed by Jake Kasdan (Orange County - awesome!). The movie was also obviously written in crayon by Judd Apatow's kids.

I give this 2 Goobers (out of 10).

This movie was terrible. It reminded me of movies like "Not Another Teen Movie" & "Scary Movie 2". Judd Apatow's (40 Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up, Freaks & Geeks) golden touch may finally be gone. It reminded me of Talladega Nights...after Will Ferrell had come off a string of "Old School" & "Anchorman". This movie was just BAD. A handful of high school kids got up and walked out about an hour in and I regret not following suit.

One somewhat bright spot was the lead actor. John C. Reilly is a very talented actor and a decent singer as well. Unfortunately, he was stuck with a terrible script and a movie that dragged like a dead body. Walk Hard attempted to parody "Walk the Line" and also the general history of rock & roll, but where some parodies work...this one falls flat. The movie drags at the beginning and end, the middle is where Apatow could have been very creative...however he chose to rush through 30-odd years of history and not focus on any single part. Another puzzle piece this movie lacked was jokes, the comedy was so uninspired and dug for the lowest levels of humor. I hope Apatow can rebound from this.

Aside from the talented Reilly, the other bright spot in the movie was the all-star group that imitated the Beatles. Shown above, Jack Black was Paul, Paul Rudd was John, Justin Long played George and Jason Schwartzman played Ringo. Oh yeah, Jack White plays Elvis...awesome!

Furthermore, Jenna Fischer (the (American) Office, Blades of Glory) has now been a part of two horrible comedy "epics" that promised too much. She is not a talented comedian and not much of an actress either... she should have been replaced...her role as boring Pam is what she should stick to.

Anyway, I plan on never watching this movie again...not in the theater, on DVD, on cable or even on network television. If I can get through the rest of my life without catching 5 minutes of this movie I will be happy.

The movie did make me want to listen to George Harrison's All Things Must Pass...so that's something.

Don't Be a Dick - Vol. 1

2007-12-20T14:49:00.000-05:00

This is going to become an ongoing post of everday etiquette...

I just came back from lunch and held the door for a GOOD six seconds...dude just looks at me, like I SHOULD be holding the door. Instant regret on my part and this leads me to a new repeating column.

Volume 1 - Holding the Door

Don't be a dick...hold the door when someone is walking behind you. If you are the one walking through a simple "Thank You" is necessary.

Guidelines...

-The door should be held for any distance under five seconds. Anything over is at the discretion of the holder. Any door held over five seconds definately deserves a hearty "Thanks."

-If the door is held in a distance under one and a half seconds, the "thank you" is not required, but always acceptable.

-The door should also be held more often in inclement weather (cold, snow, wind, rain, etc.).

-Allowing other people through and also allowing women, children, and old people earns bonus points

Flying Reminds Me of Another "F" Word

2007-12-20T10:41:00.000-05:00

In the last year, I have taken trips (small and large) more often than I have in my entire life. Lucky for me the airline industry moves as smoothly as an anchor covered in sand paper. I can't stand flying anymore. It's not the actual flying, but all the things in between. This ranges from flight connections, dealing with any flight attendant, the wonderful food, watching "No Reservations" twice in four days, sitting in space that would be inhumane to death row inmates and of course the babies...everywhere!

So, with my flight I was delayed 2 hours in Chicago's O'hare airport. I am tired of hearing, "that's the way it is now." I don't buy that. The airlines, like everything else, is a product. If I kept getting hair in my Chicken Nuggets at Wendy's I would STOP going. The problem is there is no other form of transportation that compares and the US government is still feeding airlines like Delta and American subsidies. The money needs to be cut off, they need to struggle and make changes, that's what good businesses do. This will ultimately benefit the consumer and that is what is important. Just as important as those tiny little pretzels they hand out on a four hour flight.

More to come SOON!

2007-12-19T10:10:00.000-05:00

Hey everybody... (Hose)! There will be more to come in the next week or so as I have some extra time from the X-Mas vacation...potential topics include...

1. My Boycott of the Airlines

2. Christmas in Kansas City

3. Delicious BBQ in K.C.

4. My trip to L.A. to see Lori and possible grad school options?

Stay tuned! I hit 100!

The reason I have been listening to so much rap.

2007-11-16T09:57:00.000-05:00

Look at the hit count...almost at 30!!!

Anyway, I realized early this morning why for the last 2 months I have been listening to solely hip-hop music. It has to do with a cognitive block from all my favorite college radio. I can no longer listen to bands such as: Death Cab, Postal Service, the Flaming Lips, Guster, and every other student alt-rock band I used to. The reasoning for this is the very real memories that these songs conjure up. As I listened to Death Cab this morning at work all I could think of was banging out 5 pagers at 2 am, looking forward all week to a wonderful Wed. Night in CollegeTown with Group Therapy, Zach at Dino's, Mama T's Pizza and finding out way too late how great Ruloff's and CollegeTown bagels are. This music also makes me remember all of the wonderful friends I found at IC and how easily I could spend time with any of you, at any time, because everyone was within 2 square miles.

I have yet to really miss Ithaca. Moving down to VA, doing the job hunt, and now working has kept me pretty busy. But, now as I have to boycott about 10 gigs on my iPod, I realize that Georgetown will never be Collegetown and Dupont Circle will never be the Commons, and everyone I meet will be wonderful, but we will not share that common bond of college for those four incredible years.

So, in conclusion, no more Death Cab. No more college radio. Maybe I will do grad school at Cornell.

* Hey check out my ghetto creative MS Paint job. Nice? I will have to develop my artistic skills in future posts.

Almost a Victim of GANG VIOLENCE

2007-11-14T09:36:00.001-05:00

Sooo, I had my mother and sister come for a visit to wonderful VA prior to the Thanksgiving break. I wanted them to come up because I will not be visiting family this Turkey Day, instead I will be witnessing the eternal bond that David McAlpin and Katie Bowen will form(and get really drunk off open bar at the wedding).

Anyway, my mom was leaving this past Monday and to finish off a fun weekend we decided to see Lars and the Real Girl (good movie for a date). The walk from the hotel to the theater is a short walk in a populated area of Ballston, VA.

However, the route we took had only a group of three drunk guys and no other human beings. I noticed these three instantly and made sure to walk with heightened seneses. As my mother and I veered right, one of the drunk punks decided to get in our way and stare me down.

Now, I have had my share of drunken nights and confrontations, but there is a difference between college guys running their mouths and what I witnessed on Sunday night. This guy was well into his late 20s and had a different look in his eye. He also could have cared less that I was with my little mother. He was a disrespectful punk but I was hoping nothing serious would occur.

Fortunately, nothing did occur. We enjoyed the movie and the weekend overall.

The next night I had a hard time missing the HUGE action between the two juggernauts on MNF (Seattle and San Fran). I flipped on the History channel and they were in the middle of the series "Gangland". This mini-series deals with the major gangs across the U.S. including the Aryan Brotherhood and MS-13. The latter, is a major El Salvadorian gang that has a large population in NORTHERN VIRGINIA! Yes, the most affluent county in the U.S. is home to a gang that enjoys carrying machetes, stabbing victims 13 times, and using their bodies as an Etch-a-Sketch. I instantly freaked out and jumped to the highest conclusions. Please take a minute to research this NoVA gang and realize how weird I feel when I stumble home on the weekends.

*In other news, I broke the 20 viewers mark! Ya! Of course I still believe that Hose-Man is my only regular viewer

*This column also makes me reflect on what a great song "I'm So Hood" by DJ Khaled is.

American Gangster

2007-11-08T11:24:00.000-05:00

American Gangster was directed by Ridley Scott (Gladiator,Black Hawk Down) and stars Denzel Washington (see Fallen) and Russell Crowe (see Mystery,Alaska). The movie ran about 2hrs40mins but I seldom felt the length.

The movie receives 9.0/10.0 Goobers, in my opinion.

I had fairly high expectations going into the movie. You know you will get a quality movie from the Scott brothers record: both recently (Domino & Man on Fire) to their stellar past (Crimson Tide, Gladiator, Top Gun). Gangster, did not disappoint. Washington plays a perfect dramatic foil to Crowe and vice-versa. The character development of both actors is superb with the exception of Denzel's family ties.

The plot of the movie stays on course and develops fully with an interesting ending. The violence, historical context, & political undertones are all used carefully and do not overwhelm the viewer. I also thought the supporting cast did a good job. The movie looked like a BET music video with Common & T.I. (pre-prison). But, Chiwetel Ejiofor is developing into a great actor.

My own personal "wow factor" is the sole reason that Gangster did not receive that sought-after 10th Goober. This is an irrational, incalculable feeling that I generally receive at the beginning of the end credits. I have to say that I hardly receive this feeling, the only two instances I can remember at this time came from Guy Ritchie's Snatch and Mel Gibson's Braveheart.

*Don Cheadle was considered for the role of Frank Lucas

*Brad Pitt and Benecio de Toro were in line to play Richie Roberts

So, I would definately recommend this movie to ALL of my readers...so, Dan go see this movie.

Delicious Late Night Food

2007-11-07T09:00:00.000-05:00

I recently spent a weekend back in Western NY for a number of reasons including a bachelor party and a Bills football game. It was good to be back in WNY and I definately could sense a difference from my new residence in Virginia. I always consider the Buffalo/Niagara region as pergatory, the bland world stuck between Heaven(Toronto) and Guaranteed Hell(Rochester). There is just something about the people, the weather, the city and even the culture that is unqiue to the region. It could have been the blue-collar atmosphere, the powerlines...everywhere,maybe the Zubaz "zebra-striped" pants from 1990 that you can still spot today in the parking lot of Rich Stadium, or the delicious food like Jim's Steakout. I am not sure what it was but something about WNY will always feel like home.

The weekend included great hospitality from Hose-man and Billy Pops, an ill-fated choice in movies with a day-time trip to Dan in Real Life (review pending), and a nice little trip up to the 2nd best strip club in the Northeast, The Sundowner (1st place obviously being awarded to Kuma's of Ithaca).

*Interesting thought of the trip: As I sat in the first row of the airplane between Philadelphia and D.C. I got a sneak peek of the actual cabin of an airliner. While most of it looked like a series of complex knobs, levers and gauges, one piece of the cabin left me unsettled. Towards the base of the cockpit was a giant red binder marked, "Quick Reference Guide". This upset me for two reasons:

Quick Reference Guides should be used for all those kids from Schroeder who dropped out and needed "quick tips" on building that perfect Double Whopper.

The guide itself looked old. I mean it looked like it was written and published right between the 1st flight at Kittyhawk and 1895. If you MUST have a "Idiot's Guide to Flying a Commercial Airline" you would hope they would update it annually.

Hi Everybody!

2007-11-06T09:24:00.000-05:00

This is my first post on a new blog that I have decided to start with inspiration from the "Hose-Man." I will utilize this blog to do a number of things: review movies, product testing, general thoughts, and whatever other topics I can think of. I know many people believe that blogs are for ego-maniacs...I hope that is not what is happening here. The other source of my inspiration for this blog was Jason Simoni, who owns the blog "SimoniSays" on this same website. This first post is quite boring...but stay tuned.